临终者要告诉你的人生哲理

What the Dying Want You to Know About Life

It was a rainy December day when I knocked on Melissa and Bradley’s door for the first time. I was 1）pregnant， cold， wet and without an umbrella； it rarely rains here. Melissa answered the door， quiet， 2）sullen， with dark bags under her eyes， and probably （definitely） 3）anemic. She devoted all of her time to taking care of Bradley， 4）at her expense. Since his 5）ALS 6）diagnosis， Bradley had become steadily weaker， less capable. Refusing a voice-7）assistive device， he had been reduced to 8）grunts and nods， a barely effective means of communication. He had been robbed of the ability to stand， walk or to use his 9）limbs at all.

Melissa embraced me in the doorway， the 10）desperate 11）grip of someone who had lost hope. She had never seen me. No matter.

12）Hospice does that to people. It makes strangers family.

Melissa took my13）saturated sweater， saying， “I don’t see your wings， but I know they are there. You are surely an angel.” She invited me in， offered me a cookie and showed me a seat.

That day stands out， maybe because Bradley and Melissa are so much like me and my husband. Maybe because I saw my own sullen face in hers. Maybe because of the 14）profound fear that I felt； the fear of losing someone you love so deeply， so deeply that the world couldn’t possibly continue to move around the sun without them.

When you tell people you’re a hospice nurse， the 15）default comment is always， “Oh I could never do that. I would cry all the time.” In truth， those who work in hospice do cry， not every day， but certainly enough. Still， despite the tears shed， there is a real 16）privilege in being at the bedside of the dying. I’ve traded my 17）stethoscope in （at least 18）temporarily） for a laptop. But my hospice experiences are 19）indelibly 20）etched， and what I learned from the dying is important. And worth sharing.

Don’t 21）sweat the small stuff （it’s all small stuff）. At the end of your life， everything that’s not vitally important―oh， let’s say， whether or not your pants are too tight―suddenly seems really unimportant. Ask yourself if what worries you will still worry you in 10 or 20 or 50 years. Answer honestly.

Don’t ignore pains， aches or 22）symptoms of disease. Especially those involving the breast， 23）testicles， 24）bowels or skin. This isn’t particularly deep or moving. But it’s important. These things 25）sneak up on you. Many people wish they had faced their fear， seen the doctor earlier and gotten treatment earlier. 东西坏了，就去修补。最重要的一点是，在每个人生命的最后时刻，破裂的关系是他们所共有的一个遗憾。无论是与父母、孩子还是兄弟姐妹，如果关系还能修复，就去修复它。但不必剜肉补疮，不过，如果可以的话，还是要去尝试。最终爱是一切。

在临终关怀所里，有的不止是无尽的泪水，也有很多东西值得记取学习。

1） pregnant [5pre^nEnt] a. 怀孕的

2） sullen [5sQlEn] a. 愠怒的，闷闷不乐的

3） anemic [E5ni：mIk] a. 贫血的，患贫血症的

4） at one’s expense 以某人的损失为代价

5） ALS= Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis

肌萎缩侧索硬化症

6） diagnosis [daIE^5nEJsIs] n. 诊断

7） assistive [E5sIstIv] a. 辅助的，帮助的

8） grunt [^rQnt] n. 咕噜声，咕哝

9） limb [lIm] n. 肢，翼，分支

10） desperate [5despErEt] a. 令人绝望的，危急的

11） grip [^rIp] n. 掌握，控制

12） hospice [5h？spIs] n. 临终关怀所

13） saturated [5sAtFEreItId] a. 浸透的

14） profound [prE5faJnd] a. 深刻的，深奥的

15） default [dI5fC：lt] a. 常态的

16） privilege [5prIvIlIdV] n. 特权

17） stethoscope [5steWEskEJp] n. 听诊器

18） temporarily [5tempErErIlI] ad. 暂时地，短暂地

19） indelibly [In5delEblI] ad. 擦不掉地，不能消灭地

20） etch [etF] v. 刻划，铭刻

21） sweat the small stuff 为小事担心

22） symptom [5sImptEm] n. 症状，征兆

23） testicle [5testIkEl] n. 睾丸

24） bowel [5baJEl] n. 肠

25） sneak up on 偷偷地接近

26） illusion [I5lu：VEn] n. 幻觉，幻影

27） prioritize [praI5C：rItaIz] v. 优先考虑

28） sage [seIdV] a. 睿智的，贤明的

29） vessel [5vesEl] n. 器皿，容器

30） obsess [Eb5ses] v. 纠缠，困扰

31） saggy [5sA^I] a. 松懈的，下垂的

32） varicose [5vArIkEJs] a. 静脉曲张的，肿胀的

33） stretch mark 妊娠纹，白纹

34） mole [mEJl] n. 痣，胎块

35） detriment [5detrImEnt] n. 损害，伤害